We Too Choose Honest Arrogance
[Roxane Gay / July 3rd, 2009 / Young Bright Things ]I like when a writer knows their work is good. I like when a writer is unapologetic about their talent and doesn’t make excuses for their ambition or success. How can you expect an editor to fall in love with your writing if you consistently diminish your own talent? When you say read me, like me, accept me even though I hate me, that’s false advertising.
It’s a shame that we don’t see a lot of genuine confidence in the writing world. Part of it is that many writers are dealing with any number of neuroses and insecurities. I count myself as part of that population. Part of it is peer pressure. Secretly, most of us think the world of ourselves. When it comes to the public face we paint on each day, self-deprecation becomes de riguer because we want to fit in. It’s what everyone else is doing. We say we’re not that good or we’re lucky or we’re not as good as and then offer a list of writers who are bigger better stronger faster. Maybe that isn’t necessary.
Many writers fear being branded with the scarlet letter of arrogance. However, confidence is not synonymous with arrogance. I acknowledge that there are many arrogant writers in the world. (Stop looking at me!) Sometimes that arrogance is justified. Other times, it is largely unfounded. Two things, to my mind, distinguish confidence from arrogance—talent and humility—but humility doesn’t mean pretending you aren’t an amazing writer. It means acting with grace whenever possible. It means keeping your talent in perspective and remaining open to criticism and rejection and reality. Â And let’s face it. If you’re talented enough, you don’t need much humility. Frank Lloyd Wright once said, “Early in life, I had to choose between honest arrogance and hypocritical humility. I chose honest arrogance and have seen no occasions to change.” In the spirit of that sentiment, share your honest arrogance with us.
Happy Fourth of July Weekend, Americans. And for the rest of us, TGIF! Coming Monday, a fun fun interview wtih the editor of You Must Be This Tall To Ride, B.J. Hollars.
One of my least favorite things a writer can do in a cover letter is write something like “I’m sending this story for your rejection” or “I await your rejection.” That kind of passive aggressive cover letter really turns me off, and while I would never, ever reject something just because it’s got a bad cover letter–it’s the work that gets accepted or rejected, not the writer, always, always–it does bother me personally, because it seems to be meant to illicit a pity response in me, and to somehow make me feel too bad to reject the work or to force a personal response, and I find that kind of distasteful. As you say in a much nicer way above: Send your best work, and send it with friendliness and confidence. We’ll do our best to respond in kind.
I absolutely agree. I’ve been really working on just not doing that because either you believe in your work or you don’t and if you don’t you either need to fix yourself or fix your work. The I’m waiting for rejection writers are mostly waiting for attention.
I’ve seen a fair amount of arrogance after I’ve rejected stories. People writing back to tell me I wouldn’t know a good story if it bit me in the ass or that I was afraid to publish their masterwork.
Steve, I’ve seen a lot of that too. One writer wrote back to tell us that perhaps he had underestimated his importance as a poet. We’ve all saved that e-mail. It’s a classic. There’s nothing you can do about crazy but point, laugh, or pity.
Wow, I can’t believe that people actually respond like that to rejection. I cannot even imagine having that kind of ego. I just look at rejections as a plain fact of life; they don’t mean I suck, and they don’t mean the mag sucks, they just mean that piece wasn’t the right fit for that issue. I mean, I would never send the “here is my story for rejection” cover letter, either, because I would never submit anything I felt that lousy about. But I’ve never been shocked or angered by a rejection. It’s all part of the game…
So many people have told me to stop being arrogant and here PANK is telling me the opposite. I love the FLW quote, I’ve said the same thing, with so much less eloquence, many times.
I agree about the excessive self-deprecation, but at the other end of the spectrum it drives me crazy to be told how groundbreaking, radical, avant garde, etc a story is before I read it. If it’s THAT exceptional, I hope I’ll notice; if it isn’t, you’ve set me up for disappointment. I prefer the work to speak for itself, and the cover letter to stay out of the way.
“If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter,
For always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.” – Les Crane.
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